


if you get lost in the light (it's okay, i can see in the dark)

by lilsoftgay



Series: writers month 2020 <3 [1]
Category: Victorious (TV)
Genre: F/F, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-01
Updated: 2020-08-01
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:27:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25658176
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilsoftgay/pseuds/lilsoftgay
Summary: “What will it be this time?”“Uhm. I need something small and subtle but that says I’m sorry, like I’m really sorry and I promise that was the last time.”“Again?”---writer's month 2020 - day 1 : flower shop / tattoo artist au
Relationships: Cat Valentine & Jade West, Cat Valentine/Jade West
Series: writers month 2020 <3 [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1861795
Comments: 9
Kudos: 63
Collections: Writer's Month 2020





	if you get lost in the light (it's okay, i can see in the dark)

**Author's Note:**

> tw : implied / referenced abuse
> 
> happy day 1 of writer's month 2020, in which i challenge myself to write daily and to post what i write instead of giving in to perfectionism and wanting to hold on to it forever and continuously edit it
> 
> i had a weird twisty idea for this, and it's actually one that id love to go deeper into and continue in the future or at least expand on it, but anyway here's what i wrote on today. hope you enjoy! 
> 
> title is from since we're alone by niall horan ♡

Smiling sadly, the young florist jumped down off the counter and smiled as her most frequent customer walked through the door again. 

“What will it be this time?” 

“Uhm. I need something small and subtle but that says I’m sorry, like I’m really sorry and I promise that was the last time.”

“Again?”

“I swear, this time I mean it.”

With a sigh, the florist got to work, crafting a small spray of white roses (devotion) and added some ivy (dependability & support) for a deep green contrast. 

“Please don’t come back soon.” she said with a smirk as she tucked a stray piece of hair back into her ponytail. It had been a few months, she couldn’t even remember how long ago it had started at this point, that he would come in every couple of weeks needing yet another apology bouquet of some variety. From the small single red rose, to the gigantic 200 flower bouquet he’d ordered three months ago. She wondered how he could live with himself, and which poor woman he was cheating on so often, but never let her judgement cloud her service. 

The man nodded and paid quickly. In cash, always in cash. He ducked his head to avoid her gaze as he all but ran out the door, throwing a quick thank you over his shoulder as he did so. 

(Though really he should just keep a running tab at this point.)

With a glance around the shop, slow business that morning, she grabbed a couple of white orchids, turned the ‘open’ sign to ‘closed for lunch’ and wandered across the street. 

\---

“Hey Jade!”

Jade tipped her head up, smiling as she caught the red head’s eyes across the tattoo parlor. “Hey yourself. How much longer?”

Cat glanced at the bicep in front of her and back at the clock, “One ice cream’s lifespan in 60 degree weather.”

Jade laughed quietly and sank into the soft leather chair, worn down over the years, by the reception table, ready to wait for however long Cat needed to finish up the design. She reached over the desk silently to grab the book of custom designs Cat kept there for clients to flip through, admiring the small bouquet of bright magenta lilacs (passion) as she did so. 

“Are you cheating on me with another florist, Catarina dear?” Jade joked, raising an eyebrow. She’d had some magenta lilacs in her own flower store earlier that month, but they’d sold out quickly mostly thanks to some soccer mom or other needing them for whatever a “grade card reveal party“ was. 

A smile tugged at the younger woman’s lips, as she frowned in concentration, bending closer over the arm she was tattooing. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Jade’s laugh echoed through the tattoo parlor as she sank back into the chair, flipping through the designs to see if Cat had added any new ones. She shrugged to herself, figuring she’d probably brought over the flowers at some point when she’d come in for some work on her most recent tattoo (a quote on her ribs) and forgotten all about it. Or Cat had taken some from the shop when she’d come over on one of her smoke breaks between clients. It’s not as though either of them kept track, it all came out in the wash anyway, from the smallest of trades to the biggest. 

(Cat had tattooed the complete sleeve on her right arm in exchange for the wedding flowers she’d put together for her half a year earlier.)

“What’ll it be this time?” Cat smiled carefully as she walked over, waving goodbye to her client, eyeing the lilies Jade had daintily laid onto the reception desk. She moved them to her bag underneath the desk, so she wouldn’t forget them on her way out. 

“Nah, nothing in mind. Just knew you’d need those today.” Jade waited for a small nod of recognition before distracting Cat away from the flowers. “I want meatballs for lunch today. Subway?”

Rubbing gently at her shoulder, Cat nodded slowly. “I’m not very...”

“I know. You don’t have to eat. Just keep me company.” Jade said, picking up the tattoo parlor keys and walking out. 

\---

Jade stood up straighter as the shop’s bell rang again, signaling a new customer, but kept her eyes on the bouquet in front of her. Friday lunchtimes were almost always busy for them, and today was no exception. 

“Welcome to Rose & Scissors, I’ll be with you in a moment, is there anything I can help with today?”

“Trade you the start of your next sleeve for a few bright magenta lilacs?”

Jade’s eyes snapped up to meet Cat’s. “I thought I gave you them y-”

“You did.” Cat cut her off swiftly, ducking her head and turning around to pull herself up onto the counter that Jade was working at. “I uh, accidentally left them on the subway on my way home.”

Grateful that Cat was staring out the shop door rather than at her, Jade didn’t bother to hide her raised eyebrows. She sighed when Cat didn’t elaborate further. “Ohhh-kay. Yeah sure, just give me a moment to finish up this monstrosity, the customer’s coming to pick it up any moment now.” 

Cat gripped the counter below her, digging her fingernails into the soft wood, swaying side to side slightly along with the music Jade had playing in the background. “Oh? Who’s it for?”

“This really adorable kid who wants a bouquet for her girlfriend but had no idea how to even order a bouquet and asked me to walk her through all the steps.” 

Cat almost fell off the counter laughing, only saving herself by grabbing on to Jade’s arm as the florist reached out to hold her in place. “That’s adorable, oh my God.”

“She was a pretty sweet kid. Nervous as hell though. She reminds me of me when I was younger, actually.” 

“You? Nervous and shy?” Cat laughed again, bracing herself better on the counter this time. 

Jade joined in, chuckling softly as she wrapped a soft pink bow around the bouquet featuring pink lilies (femininity & admiration). “No, just highly insecure and not having a clue how to express my emotions in words.” 

Cat tilted her head to the side, trying to picture a younger Jade being insecure. 

“So.” Jade spoke loudly, leaving no space for Cat to ignore her, as she walked around the shop gathering everything she’d need to re-make Cat’s small spray of flowers. “ You’re going to see him tonight instead?”

“Yeah.” 

“Why didn’t you just go straight there from work yesterday?”

Cat’s voice was soft from the other end of the shop, barely above a whisper and Jade didn’t hear what she’d said beyond the word home. 

“HI! I’m here for the flowers!” 

Jade had to bite back a laugh at the overenthusiastic teen that had returned to collect the bouquet she’d ordered a few hours earlier. She cast a glance at Cat as she collected the teen’s payment and waved her off to run and tell her girlfriend she loved her in flowers. The tattoo artist was lost in her own thoughts, a small frown tugging the corners of her lips downward and making a small dent appear on her forehead right between her eyebrows. Jade raised an eyebrow again, not used to seeing that particular expression on her sweet Cat’s face. 

Shaking her head and turning to the flowers she’d been holding loosely in her hand instead, Jade made quick work of re-making the same bouquet she’d made the day before, something she didn’t often do. 

“Here you go, baby girl.” Jade handed the bright magenta lilac spray tied in a white ribbon. “Don’t lose them to the city this time, please.”

Cat nodded quietly, gently stroking the edge of one of the stems. “I’m really sorry! I should have been more careful and I-”

“Don’t even mention it. Just get my sleeve started tomorrow, yeah?”

Cat perked up at that, and finally met Jade’s eyes. “I’ve blocked out from 5pm so that no one can bother us.” 

Swinging herself off the counter (somehow landing perfectly despite the six inch heels she was in) and blowing a kiss in Jade’s direction, Cat opened the door twice just to hear the bell ring extra.

“Tell him hi from me!”

“Always.”

\--

“Okay, so this is what I was thinking.” Cat pulled out a private sketchbook, filled with all her wildest, most precious drawings and tattoo designs that no one ever saw. Well except for Jade. 

Jade took the sketchbook gently, staring at the design, and taking in each detail a little bit at a time.

“So it starts with the forget-me-nots at the top for your mom, then turns into orchids, closest to your heart because they mean so much to you, fire lily at your elbow because you’re feisty when you knock out idiot drunk guys that try to grope me while they get their tattoos, lilies on your forearm for all the soft poetry you write. And the smallest cactus right at your wrist. Because cactus.” 

Jade’s eyes grew wider as she looked up from the design to meet Cat’s eyes. 

“You like it?” 

“Like it? It’s the most perfect thing anyone could have ever designed for me.”

Cat squealed, bouncing up and down a couple times then gently moved Jade towards the comfiest tattoo chair. 

Jade kept staring at the sleeve design as she settled into the chair, tucking her hair into a bun with one hand and rolling the cardigan sleeve on her left arm up, ready for Cat to decorate. 

“How did it go yesterday?”

“Same old, same old. I told him you said hi.” Cat smiled, her voice soft as she got all the equipment ready. 

“Did he like the flowers?” Jade asked lightly, turning the sketchbook in her hands to see the design from a different angle. 

“I think so.” Cat hummed. “I miss him a lot. I wish he was actually here.”  
Jade looked up at Cat, not used to the artist admitting that her brother wasn’t actually present. 

(She remembered the shock the first time a tipsy Cat had shared about her brother. The two had never spoken about it the next day, or any day after, opting to keep the conversation between them light and airy as usual. Just another silent agreement between the two of them.)

Jade’s eyes narrowed as Cat brought a pencil towards her left arm, ready to stencil the design on. “Cat what happened to your wrist?”

Cat flicked her eyes down, and pulled her sleeve down to her knuckles. Pressing her lips together and humming slightly, she started the first forget-me-not. “Oh, it’s so silly, I snapped on my gloves too hard this morning and it must have left a little mark.” 

Jade pressed her own lips together, choosing to not mention that she could tell that the bruise around Cat’s wrist from her tattooing gloves was two days old from its color, and tilted her head to watch Cat work away at the orchid instead. 

Light and airy. 

\---

Jade stood at her work top the next morning, snapping the same brand of gloves over and over against her wrist. Try as she might, she couldn’t get a bruise to form. 

\---

The bell rang as Jade put the finishing touches on a bouquet of black roses (fuck you) for a woman who’d caught her wife cheating on her with their nanny. 

“Hey Cat! Haven’t seen you in a couple weeks?” 

The question hung in the air as the tattoo artist walked over to the display of daffodils (forgiveness) and grabbed one. She handed it to Jade silently, and the florist tucked it into her hair without a word, smiling softly at Cat. 

“Are you seeing him tonight?” 

Cat nodded, jumping onto the counter, and sighing as one of her high heels clattered to the floor. 

Shrugging a laugh off, Jade picked the shoe up and held it out for Cat to slide her foot back into. 

“Alright Cinderella, well I have something for you to bring him, then.” 

Finally breaking a smile, Cat looked at Jade expectantly, her smile only widening when she saw the small spray of gladiolus flowers (rememberence) that Jade had already wrapped in a white ribbon for her. 

Cat flinches slightly as Jade holds the spray out for her to take. 

Jade almost asks her if she’s upset her somehow, but doesn’t. “You gonna talk today or is it a quiet I-really-miss-him day?”

Cat shrugged.

Jade shrugged back as she moved back to work. She tied a shiny bow around the small cactus (you’re a prick) she’d set aside as a gift for her most frequent customer who’d be coming by later to pick up his most recently ordered bouquet, a giant spray of white tulips (purity & forgiveness) for whatever he’d done now. 

“No ragrets.” 

Jade looked up at the small giggle, thoroughly confused but catching on to Cat’s infectious laughter as she waited for Cat to explain. 

“Two guys, drunk. Last night. No ragrets.” Cat traced an arc at the base of her neck, just above her collarbones, wincing slightly. 

Jade stared at her for a second while the gears in her brain worked, and laughed loudly enough to startle Cat a bit when it finally clicked. “I didn’t think anyone actually got those tattoos anymore. I can’t believe you let them.” 

Shrugging lightly, Cat smirked as she jumped back down from the counter, less gracefully than usual. “Funny.” 

Jade stared at the red head, almost asking, but not wanting to crack the thin veneer of light & airy that they’d built over the years. 

“6pm tomorrow?” Cat asked as she played with the door, making the bell jingle softly. 

“6pm tomorrow.” Jade sighed deeply as she watched Cat’s petite figure make her way back to her tattoo parlor across the street. 

It was the first of their unspoken agreements from when they’d first met each other. They didn’t talk about anything serious, anything heavy, unless they were drunk. 

(They were drunk the first night they met.)

Jade had gone in for a tattoo, a small minimalist outline of a pair of scissors on her left hip. Tipsy enough to think it would be a beautiful, meaningful tattoo, but still sober enough to understand the decision she was making. 

It wasn’t until a year later that she realized Cat had been drunk that night too. 

She’d scared the tattoo artist when she burst into the studio, not yet knowing Cat or that loud sudden noises made her flinch. 

It didn’t take long for the scissor outline to be etched into Jade’s skin permanently. But it was long enough for both of them to realize that they felt more at peace around each other than anywhere else on earth. 

Cat was sober the next day when she went to buy a bouquet of flowers from Jade’s brand new flower shop with the overly generous tip Jade had left. Just her luck that their stores would be across the street from each other now. 

They didn’t talk about the night before, about the way they knew what the other’s lips tasted like, about the secrets they’d spilled. 

Cat mentioned her fiancée with a frown, and Jade offered her services, her flower services she clarified, for the wedding. 

A silent agreement was started. They never talked about anything serious, or life changing, or personal. 

(Unless they were tipsy.)

\---

Jade smiled at the lilies Cat had just finished tattooing onto her arm, the sleeve growing nicely. 

“Are you sure about the cactus bit? I really don’t want something that says I’m a prick on my wrist.”

Cat smiled, rubbing her hand softly against her ribs, “Actually, it can also mean endurance. That... it reminded me of you. That’s why I added it in the design.”

Jade’s eyes softened as she took in the answer, sweeping her head to look around the parlor to hide the blush she knew was on her cheeks. 

\---

“Hey, I knew you were planning on visiting your brother today, and you usually come over to pick up a small spray but I hadn’t seen you and I figured you were busy so I brought you som- What the fuck. Cat? Cat?” 

She should have known that the snap of her voice would put Cat on edge, but she hadn’t expected that big of a reaction as the younger woman all but flew backwards, tripping over the tattoo chair, eyes wide and face pale. 

Jade couldn’t help it, she’d recognize her own work anywhere. 

“Where did you get that bouquet of white tulips?”

Cat stands up, and walks towards Jade silently. She holds her hand out for the small spray of daisies (innocence) and marigolds (pain). 

Jade stares at her for a moment, the hands the bouquet to her wordlessly. 

\---

There’s a single peach rose (gratitude) on the flower shop’s doorstep when Jade arrives to unlock the next morning. 

Closing the door behind her, Jade smiles when she sees the tattoo parlor’s lights are on across the street. It’s probably the first time Cat has ever gotten to work before her. 

She puts the rose in a small vase, sniffing it happily, wondering if Cat had gotten the different rose meanings mixed up again. 

\---


End file.
